Wise Counsel From Susan Quilliam: To shave or not to shave

Dear Susan
I’ve always shaved my pubic hair – to me it’s more hygienic and just looks better. But my new man is anti and wants me to let it grow back – he says that a shaved pussy is just too “childlike” for him, and he wants me to look like a real woman. Who’s right?
Lulu
Hi Lulu
Neither of you is right and neither of you ia wrong, Pubic shaving is absolutely a personal preference. It’s also a fashion – up to a decade ago it was hardly ever done, then suddenly it became chic, and now – according to research from Indiana University – two thirds of younger people do it, while hardly anyone does who’s over 50.
As to pros and cons, you can argue it’s more hygienic. You can argue that absent the hair you’re more sensitive and a rousable You can argue that shaving makes it easier for a partner to give you oral sex. But what really makes you ‘pro’ or ‘con’ is going to be the associations you have about pubic shaving. Clearly your man associates bare genitals with children, you associate them with mature feminine beauty. Both associations are real, deep and possibly immovable.
What to do? I’d try letting your hair grow back, just to see if you can get used to it. But if it feels too bad, then I’d try shaving – and then see if your man can used to it. This is unlikely to be a deal-breaker – but it is something worth getting sorted between you.
[Ed: Or as a compromise you could grow it but keep it neatly trimmed!]
Susan Quilliam also offers email, phone and face-to-face coaching on relationship and sexuality issues. Contact her here.

 

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