I have a great and very understanding boyfriend. The problem is I can't tell him what I want. He's more experienced than me, and tells me what he wants me to do when I'm giving him oral and occasionally hand jobs, but he's the only guy who's ever given me decent oral (more than a few seconds), so I have nothing to compare him to. It feels really good, but I'd like to be able to suggest new things.
Even in the areas where I know what I like, and want him to do something different, I find it really hard to talk about it. I know he wants to make it really good for me so I don't think he'd mind, but I usually just let him do it his way. Any advice?

Cliterati repliesTelling your partner what you want is one of the best ways to improve your sex life. It may seem embarrassing but if you're happy to get intimate with him, there's really no reason to feel uncomfortable saying what you want too. Most men are more than happy to be given some guidance.To start with, you may find it easier to indicate what you like with groans and moans. If he does something you particularly enjoy, get that little bit more vocally enthusiastic. Then, work your way up to actually telling him you like it. Everyone likes to be praised so he'll love it. If you're shy, a glass of wine may help give you some Dutch courage.You could try asking him if there's anything that he particularly enjoys. If he's as understanding as you say, he's pretty likely to respond by asking you what you like afterwards. You may find it easier to tell him when he's asked you, rather than just launching into in unprompted.If this still sounds too embarrassing, why not go for the written word instead. You could write him an erotic story, detailing what you really enjoy and give it to him to read on his own when you leave after a night together. And if you're not comfortable writing, use someone else's words instead. There ar plenty of stories on Cliterati to choose from, or buy an erotic book and highlight the passages you like; Black Lace and X Libris both have some great titles for women.You could even turn it into a game. Ask him to write down a series of things he'd like, write down a series of things that you'd like then take it in turns to pick something from the list.There's no need to be embarrassed about saying what you want - or asking what your partner wants. With a bit of communication, you'll both have a lot more fun.