It would be safe to say that I'm not one of nature's most graceful creatures. I've never done any dance classes, and my sense of balance is so atrocious that I can't even ride a bike. So, when I heard about the London School of Striptease's 'Undress to Impress' course, I was sceptical that they'd be able to turn me into an elegant striptease queen. But I decided to cast aside my scepticism - and my clothes - to give the course a try.
The six week course - one hour per week - takes place in Central London at the utterly respectable Danceworks studio. Even though I'm pretty body-confident, I was still a tad nervous at the idea of disrobing in front of a room full of strangers. But when I arrived, it was clear that everyone was in the same boat. There were about fifteen women there of every age and personality type; students, housewives, business-women and a couple of people who wanted to get into the industry. We stood around, shyly smiling at each other and wondering what was to come.It's worth going on the course just to meet the fabulous tutor, Jo King. Within minutes of her bouncing up to the front of the room, her chatty style and friendly demeanor had relaxed everyone. Soon, we were into the first exercise; licking our lips sexily. It sounds embarrassing, and to start with, it was, but by pairing everyone up and getting us to 'lick our lips' at each other, then give each other pointers on how well the other had followed Jo's expert guidance, it worked brilliantly as a bonding exercise. After all, it helps to feel comfortable with the other people in the room if you're going to be stripping off.Indeed, the entire course is desiged with 'comfort levels' in mind; you don't learn to remove any underwear until week four, and Jo takes everyone to the pub together after each session, so by the time you actually do strip off, it's more like being with a group of girlie mates than 'people you share an exercise class with'. What you do learn in the first few weeks is how to walk sexily, gyrate with abandon and seductively remove tops, dresses and skirts. As the course progresses, you learn how to remove a bra, stockings and suspenders and eventually, knickers (but with a second pair of knickers on underneath, so you never have to flash your bits). There's certainly something amusing about turning up at a gym wearing a slinky frock, hoping that you've remembered your heels and suspender belt as requested!It would be easy to discount the course as something that only gives you a skill for the bedroom, but that would be underselling it to a phenomenal degree. Whilst my bloke certainly appreciated being my guinea-pig as I practiced what Jo had taught us each week, 'Undress to Impress' also helped every woman on the course to feel more body-confident. And the tricks work in a public setting too. Within a month of completing the course, I'd twice managed to use the skills in a non-bedroom environment; once by using a very much toned-down version of her 'bottom work' (bum gyration) to convince a couple of guys that they should let my mate and I on to a pool table. And a second time when I was waiting for a mate to arrive at a party. It was a glam event so I was wearing gloves. I removed them, in Jo King's recommended way (not intentionally, but she has a way of helping your subconscious absorb how to move) and within seconds, two men had come up to me and offered to buy me a drink. I'm pretty sure that the cost of the course, three months on, has been more than covered by the amount of free drinks I've attracted, and I feel more confident about my body than I ever have before. Whether you're single or attached, Jo King's 'Undress to Impress' course will certainly give you a useful life-skill! How useful? Well, when she mentioned her advanced course, I was first to sign up.
