While reading through your site I started to get the feeling that I wanted to contribute something in return for what others had shared. I thought a while and decided that I'd tell you how I discovered vibrators and orgasms.

I must have been 23 at the time I met my first real boyfriend. I was a virgin and though not against sex had no positive views on it either. To me it just wasn't part of my life. This changed quite quickly as I got serious with my boyfriend and though nothing was happening I did start to feel a wanting and I noticed the reactions my body made when I was arroused. Well, one thing lead to another and before much time had passed we had started sleeping together. This was lovely emotionally and lots of fun but I wasn't getting off and though it was fine by me my boyfriend was unhappy. Guess it was a slur on his manhood as far as he was concerned. After a while our relationship ended and I though it was to do with my 'failure' in bed. After the upset subsided I decided to see what I could do 'for next time' and eventually found out about various 'how to have an orgasm' type books, videos and websites. I ploughed through these like a student studying for university finals and became a theory expert but with no practical skills. I did try to follow some of the programs given that sought to teach you to masturbate but it was pretty useless, to me, like trying to tickle myself - it just wouldn't work.
Resigned to being a failure I all but gave up and considered making a promise to 'fake it' with any future boyfriends to keep them happy. I'm sure this is where the story would have ended if I hadn't met my now husband. I learned something quite profound. Having sex or doing any sexual act at all is not themost intimate you can be. No, talking about yourself, your feelings and sharing thise thoughts is far more intimate. Anyway I confided to my partner and he worked through it with me. Never pushing or measuring progress or anything, just supporting and being there for me.We never saw what we were doing as therapy or anything, just having fun and I became more and more relaxed being with him. Eventually something clicked and the theory I had learned meshed with the feelings I had and the freedom we had together and I had, with a lot of effort, my very first orgasm.Unfortunately, unlike in fiction, this wasn't a 'cure' and I still found reaching orgasm a very difficult and all too often impossible. My partner was great though and suggested that maybe I needed more intense stimulation than we had been able to sustain and one night he presented me with pleasure aid that changed everything. This isn't a cheap vibrator but a sex therapist endorsed item and it really worked for me. Initially I only used it when we were together and I learnt to climax quite easily before, during and after intercourse with it but after a while and encouragement from my partner I got round to using it alone occasionally then quite often and now most days when he is at work. I cannot tell you how much of a change it has all made to my life. Orgasms on demand and they are stronger and longer too.To all women that are having difficulty I'd say try a vibrator and if you can afford it, try the Eroscillator as its the best!!