When I first met Darren I couldn't believe how good looking he was. My friend had set me up with him, on the basis of his good looks. Not only that, but he was rich, intelligent and had a really nice scooter, so I thought my luck was really in!

On our first date he really spoilt me, I didn't have to pay for anything, which was just as well as it turned into a pretty expensive night. We went to a loud club which made conversation somewhat difficult, but even so I began to realise that he had very little to say for himself. Everything I said he agreed with, to the point where I was saying contradictory things and he was still agreeing with me! At the end of the night I thought his banality would come to an end in the bedroom, and as I had already spent a good few boring hours with him, I thought I might as well get some sex out of him. Back at my flat, which of course he agreed was lovely, we started to get down to it. To liven things up, I took control, and started to give him a blow job which he seemed quite happy about. Unfortunately for me, his enthusiasm was both noisy and smelly. No sooner had I got down there, when he let of an enormous fart. Unsure of how to react and inebriated by this time I just continued sucking. It was only when he repeatedly guffed that I thought it was time to give it a rest. Needless to say a long and interesting relationship did not follow!!!
I have seen him since, though I can't remember any conversation we have as I just glaze over and start dozing!!!